Friday Hangout 9th Oct Best Joke

Post by **The Aspie Toker** » Fri Oct 09, 2020 8:59 pm

Bert420 wrote: ↑
Fri Oct 09, 2020 7:50 pm
I know I don’t have many posts but just wanted to bless you with my sense of humour

What’s the difference between pink and purple???

The grip

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

It's similar to...
What's the difference between light and hard.

You can sleep with the light on.

BTW, you don't have enough posts to qualify entering the comp.

Post by **The Aspie Toker** » Fri Oct 09, 2020 9:08 pm

Chad.Westport wrote: ↑
Fri Oct 09, 2020 9:01 pm
and the bonus joke... Ok I only know two anyways

Only 2? Where have you been hiding?

I remember when my social worker came to visit. During the conversation my wife said to her that I do have a sense of humour. The SW then asked me to tell her a joke. I told her the first one that came into my head...

Why did Hitler kill himself?

Did you see the size of his gas bill?

According to the wife, the woman gave me a right old stare. I didn't know, but she was Jewish.
Somehow, somewhere, I always seem to put my foot in it.

Bert420 · Post by **Bert420** » Fri Oct 09, 2020 9:17 pm

The Aspie Toker wrote:
Bert420 wrote: ↑
Fri Oct 09, 2020 7:50 pm
I know I don’t have many posts but just wanted to bless you with my sense of humour

What’s the difference between pink and purple???

The grip

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
It's similar to...
What's the difference between light and hard.

You can sleep with the light on.

BTW, you don't have enough posts to qualify entering the comp.

That’s cool I knew I knew I didn’t qualify to enter but couldn’t resist dropping one of my amazing jokes

my good lady waxjess does the competition winning in this house

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Mini-G-Star · Post by **Mini-G-Star** » Fri Oct 09, 2020 9:30 pm

Great jokes guys loving it

bigbadbillybob · Post by **bigbadbillybob** » Fri Oct 09, 2020 9:33 pm

ok, bloke wakes up bright and early one morning, goes through to the kitchen for breakfast, before returning to the bedroom, and goes to wake his wife up.
"cmon, get up..... its Saturday, we said we would go fishing today" says the hubby

"aww noooo, i dont want to go", she replies.
"Come on", hes getting a bit angry now, "you said we would go today, ive been looking forward to it all week"
Her- " i dont want to"

so hubby looks over to her, shes looking particularly hot, and he decides to come up with a solution. "right, we either go fishing, or you give me a blowjob or anal sex" he says.
She replies "ohh ok then, ill give you a BJ"
the bloke whips out his tool and sticks it in her mouth, at which point she recoils, spits it out saying , "fuckin hell it tastes of shit"

the bloke replies "yeah, the dog didnt want to go fishing either"

ba boom boom, tish

Mini-G-Star · Post by **Mini-G-Star** » Fri Oct 09, 2020 9:54 pm

Lol

TommyT · Post by **TommyT** » Fri Oct 09, 2020 11:08 pm

A bear walks into a bar and says, “Give me a whiskey...............and a cola.”
“Why the big pause?” asks the bartender. The bear shrugged. “I’m not sure. I was born with them.”

Once my dog ate all the Scrabble tiles.
He kept leaving little messages around the house.

GrowGlow · Post by **GrowGlow** » Sat Oct 10, 2020 12:34 am

If you split 2 x 50 dollars from a 100 dollar note, no one feels any different with what they’ve got!

If you split 2 x 18 year old wives from a 36 year old wife.......

Just sayin.......

Sage · Post by **Sage** » Sat Oct 10, 2020 1:16 am

So the Hospital was all a buzz rumor was a famous footy player was on his way for treatment. Now I won't name names but you all know anyway he's a big chiseled bloke with kind eyes and most of his teeth. As all the young nurses whisper amongst themselves when he arrived The head nurse spoke up "shut your pie holes and back to it then". So they did The head nurse followed the doctors in and after the exam the docs left and she helped the poor lad into bed and set up his I.V. and left. As she passes the gaggle of young nurses she gives a snort hah and says" easy on the eyes yah but a little short elsewhere she snickers in fact has a tatoo on it say Swan" she cackles as she walks down the hall after. One young nurse says well I was lookin forward to this sponge bath now I just hope I don't giggle at the poor sod. So she enters and pulls the curtain and begins her duty. Couple minutes later the other nurses hear the latch snap locked and gather watching to see what's going on, 30 minutes later the young nurse exits adjusting her outfit. As she walks past the small crowd they say "well" she replies what? sheepishly "well was it short did it say Swan?" she turns and says she can't say would be unprofessional and takes a step away but then she says "oh by the way it doesn't say Swan, It's Says Saskatchewan" and begins humming as she walks away.